When I was in the hospital having Lydia, the nurses referred to me as "mom" and it seemed so surreal. Now that I'm on my second week of being home from the hospital, it is still surreal that I have a child. After all, I'm 36 years old and until Lydia came along, I'd never changed a poopy diaper. In fact, I only recall changing two pee diapers in my entire life, and they were for Izzy who was old enough to walk me through the process ... telling me I had the diaper on backwards.

Taken on Sunday, February 17, Lydia's first trip to the mall. Who knew something so tiny and cute could poop so much?

Now that I'm on day 11 of being a mom, I've gotten a lot of practice with poopy diapers. I've experienced what Randy describes as the "soft serve ice cream machine" poop, where I lift Lydia's legs up slightly to wipe her backside and poop just keeps coming out. ... and out ... and out. At which point, I panic and end up wasting a stack full of diapers and a half pack of wipes. A couple of times, Randy and I had to tag team these type of diaper changes. On one occasion, she let out an explosive fart but thank goodness it was dry, otherwise I would've gotten a nice new lens coating on my glasses.

Now that I have mastered the "ice cream machine" poop, I wasn't expecting the "shot put shit" today. I was changing Lydia's diaper and as I was wiping her butt, a stream of poop shot out of no where, causing me to scream and jump back ... similar to if I'd seen a snake or spider ... only to have poop land on my pants and on the floor. I never thought I'd have to use my Pet Spot Bot and Nature's Miracle to clean Lydia's mess off the floor.

While having a baby still seems surreal and changing poopy diapers can be a grossly comical experience, I'm really glad Lydia is here and am enjoying her company.